


Gifts Plentiful and Wonderful

by aNGELICmURDER



Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: M/M, Sex Toys
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-03
Updated: 2014-06-16
Packaged: 2017-11-23 12:26:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 2,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/622129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aNGELICmURDER/pseuds/aNGELICmURDER
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bunnymund receives a Christmas gift from his dear friend but it wasn't what he was expecting at all.</p><p>A/N: Former Title: Someone's Having A Happy Christmas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

Bunnymund knew his old friend had stopped by when he found a bright red and green Christmas package in front of his Warren. It smelt a bit too much like mistletoe for his liking but he was happy for the gift. He smirked and took it inside. North really had a way with entrances. The Pooka hadn’t even heard him enter. 

Bunnymund turned the box upside down and everywhere which way before shaking it. Nothing rattled inside. Maybe it was a book set? He wouldn’t mind getting a few more books for his off times. He stared at it, willing it to give up its secrets. 

“Aww this is ridiculous. I can’t know what’s inside if I don’t open it?” Aster muttered, picking up the boxk and ripping the wrapping open. He took the top off and found another box inside. Bunnymund took this one out too, opening it and discarding the stuffing before reaching to the very bottom and pulling out a long, thick flash light. Though the top was different; it had a large crevice running down it and a small nub at the top.

It took his brain a few seconds to work out what exactly it was that he was holding and when it he dropped it. “Oh fuck! What the bloody hell?”

He never thought he’s see one of those. What the bloody hell was North thinking? He packed the object back up and putting away. He’d talk to North when the man finished his Christmas run. He had a lot to explain.


	2. Chapter Two

North pulled at his beard and frowned at the frazzled Pooka before him. Bunnymund refused to stop pacing until North turned to speak. “Well Bunnymund, who ever gave you this… gift is very sneaky if he got his hands on some of my gift paper but rest assure it wasn’t me.”

“Yea mate but who’d want to send me a-a-a-”

“Sex toy?”

Bunnymund’s eyes went wide and he glared at North. “Don’t say that.”

North laughs. “Oh lighten up Bunny, I am sure it is just joke and nothing more.” He hands his friend a glass of eggnog, 

“I bet it was Jack. No mate, think about.” He started smirking. “Who else has access to your workshop and who’d want to mess with me?”

“Bunnymund” North said, putting a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Go home and get some rest. I’m sure you’ll feel better when you wake up.”

“Fine, fine.” He thumped the ground and opened a tunnel. “But I swear it’s him.”

North laughed, nodding in agreement.

 

Bunnymund made his way back to the Warren, getting ready to make a few more painting patterns when he noticed another Christmas present at his door. This one had dark blue wrapping and a bright gold bow. He huffed and opened it. It had to be North’s gift then. As soon as he popped the top he dumped the contents onto the ground and screamed. It was another of the infernal devices, this one having pictures of easter eggs on the side and came in a pastel blue colour-except the top, the top was still a fleshy colour.

A piece of paper unfurled and hit Bunnymund in the foot. He bent down and read it.

_I’m sorry about my earlier gift. I got one more in tune with your interests. Merry Christmas._

“JACK!”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And yet another one has arrived.

Bunnymund didn’t know what he going to do with his gifts. The long cylindrical objects were still in their boxes and he had moved them to the very back of his book shelf where he wouldn’t have to see them. He hunted down Jack and demanded an explanation for the perverse object now in his care. The winter spirit looked Bunnymund dead in the eyes and began laughing his head.

If Aster hadn’t been covered in fur he would have turned red. “Shut your mouth will you.”

“I can’t believe someone would send you a fleshlight. Not just one but two!” Jack flew around the Pooka who was doing everything in his power to avoid eye contact. “and you thought it was me! Is there something you’re trying to tell me something Bunny?”

“Would you rack off already?” Bunny slapped at the flying spirit before leaving. Having gotten his answer he was all too happy to return home and paint his nonperversed eggs. He thumped the ground and got ready to leave as Jack called out.

“Don’t have too much fun down there.”

Before he jumped down his tunnel, Aster tossed an egg bomb in Jack’s general direction. If it didn’t hit him at least it’d make that stupid white hair of his spring green.

When he’d gotten back to the warren everything was back to normal. No weird gifts in front of his den and no reason for him to be alarmed, outside of the weirdo breaking into his lair. He got out his sketch pads and paints, ready to pick out some special designs for the upcoming Easter when something ball shaped rolled out from behind his sketch pad. 

Aster sniffed and picked up the ball, rolling it between his paws before he opened it. The package sprang open and a long string of oval shaped beads sprang out, each decorated with ornate Easter egg designs. The same designs he had scratched last year for his eggs.

“What the bloody hell?” He gave the string a once over and found a not tied to the end.

_Since you didn’t like my last gift. I thought I'd give you a new one. In case you’re wondering, yes they are egg shaped anal beads. Have fun._

Bunny’s eye twitched and he let out a loud, blood curling scream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo guys well. I'm sorry I haven't been around but since school started my sleeping schedule went from messed up to non-existent. I'll try and update more frequently.


	4. Chapter 4

Sleeping was getting to be a real issue for Bunny. His strange stalker/gift giver was putting his nerves on the door step of anxiety. Three days had gone by since his last gift -safely and securely hidden behind a stack of books with his other unsavoury gifts- had arrived. The warren was clear of any surprises and all his ward had been put to maximum.

A shrill cry cut the air on the third night and Bunny was out of his bed and down the maze of his home to the source of the alarm. When he got there he turned off the ward and reset it, carefully checking the area for any surprising boxes or knicknacks that might have been left behind. The field was clear. 

“Yea, think you can come into my warren and leave any nasty surprises? Think again.” Bunny chuckled, brushing off his fur and heading back to his nest.

He settled in comfortably in his bed, curling up in the middle only to be stabbed in the side. He rolled over, searching for the stray piece of straw that was interrupting his sleep. He pulled out a tiny plastic rabbit. It was shiny and translucent. Bunny frowned at it before it jerked and buzzed away in his hand. On the end of it was a tiny note.

_A tiny rabbit for my giant rabbit. ;)_

Bunny's eye twitched, ears laying all the way back before he left out a wordless scream.


	5. Chapter 5

North leaned back in his chair, trying to keep a straight face but ended up smirking behind his beard. “Well Bunny this is really strange. Whoever is leaving you these gifts must have a little crush on you.”

“Oi mate it's not funny.”

“It's a little funny.”

Bunny glared at North and continued stalking his workshop. The tiny rabbit shaped bullet vibrator lay innocently on the desk as North witled a tiny wooden rocket. The workshop was silent as the end of Christmas vacation was still on and though North usually spent this time sleeping off the Christmas cookies but was now playing nursemaid to a skity rabbit.

“You try having someone break into your workshop and leaving you these-these... for godsake can't you do something? You see everyone everywhere.”

“If I knew what I was looking for then I could be of help.” North put down his sculpture and picked up the bullet vibrator. “It's not a bad design. Very cute.”

“Haha. If you like it so much why don't you keep it?” Bunny flopped down into a crouch, pausing just a bit before getting up again.

“But Bunny, obviously your admirer went out of his way to get you a gift you'd enjoy.”

“You mean my bloody stalker. Are you sure you can't magic up a way to find him?”

“If I find one you'll be the first person I tell.” North eyes twinkled. “Until then, why don't you try... examining your gifts.”

Bunny froze, mouth working as he shook. “I'm going home.”

“Come now Bunny it was a joke. Just a little joke.”

Bunny tapped the floor and jumped into his tunnel only to be hit on the head by his newest gift. Once he hit his warren he tossed the contraption as far as he could and hoped he'd never have to see it again. He stepped out of the reception area only to have something smack him in the head.

It was a box. Wrapped in shiny black paper with a note attached.

_That wasn't very nice. I'm hurt._

Bunny snarled and tossed that box after it's predecessor and wiped his paws on his fur. “Good riddance, I say.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this ended up coming to 500 words which is my limit per chapter for this story.

As pretty as the Tooth palace was, Bunny couldn't appreciate it. His nerves were fried and he'd given up sleeping. The thought of someone trespassing through his warren, watching him while he works or sleep or just running around his warren unhindered. He was still pretty sure it was Jack. North couldn't keep a secret for his life and he was sure Tooth would never leave such depraved things at his doorstep.

Bunny entered the command center where Tooth directed various fairies to the kids bedrooms. When she spotted him, she paused and instructed one of her fairies to take over.

“Bunny! You're here, I'm so glad you could make it.” She zipped around him. “What's that?”

Bunny huffed, “Somewhere private.”

They walked a bit through the tooth palace, touching on everything that's happened since they last met. Bunny told tooth about his admirer problem and all the strave gifts he'd been getting. She nodded and hummed, letting him into her tea room. She gestured to a seat and poured him a cup of tea, watching as Bunny drank the tea in one quick swallow and helped himself to another cup.

“So this box is the latest in gifts from your admirer?”

Bunny nodded. “It's just another perverse gift. I wish the bloody wanker would rack off and leave me to my eggs in peace.”

“Oh come on Bunny they can't be that bad.” Tooth smiled a bit. “You said he or she gives you gifts that all Easter themed don't they? Maybe he or she just wants you to have a nice gift. It could be something else this time.”

Bunny didn't look convinced. “if you think so then you open it.”

Tooth looked from Bunny to the box then back to Bunny. Bunny had a cheeky grin growing on his face while Tooth's cheeks turned a bit red. “Are you sure about this? It is your gift.”

“I don't care, if I could chuck it away I would. It just shows back up again. No matter where I leave it. All the other ones do the same thing.”

“Ok.” Tooth reached for the box, undoing the wrappings and tearing open the cardboard. She then dumped the contents out on the table. Out flew a small five inch dildo. It was molded with tiny beads down the sides and a well designed circumcised head. On the top was a small arm with two prongs. Inside were two double A batteries. Hitting the table had triggered it's on switch and it danced over the small surface until it hit the ground, calmly buzzing away.


	7. Chapter 7

Tooth cleared her throat. “Oh...”

“I knew it” Bunny hissed and hopped up from his seat. His pacing disturbed the flying fairies but he was too long gone to care. “When I figure out who's responsible for this I'll make him wish he'd never been made a spirit.”

“Bunny please.” Tooth put a hand on his shoulder. “You're working yourself, you have to think things through. How many people know exactly where the warren is? Do they have access to it?”

“Besides you? There's the rest of the guardians and Pitch maybe.”

Tooth nodded. “Well Pitch hasn't been around lately. Have you asked the others?”

Bunny shook and crouched down, reaching one foot up to scratch behind his ears. “Just you, North, Frost. None of 'em know anything about this.”

A fairy flew around Tooth's head, chirping and chattering nonstop. Tooth nodded and started flying away. Before she left she said, “why don't you ask Sandy? You haven't asked him yet maybe he might know a few things.”

The room went quiet, the buzzing of wings could be heard far off in other parts of the palace but for Bunny it was relatively quiet. He shrugged his shoulders and packed his 'gift' before thudding the ground. Time to pay Sandy a little visit.

 

The box rattled in Sandy's grip and Bunny rolled his eyes once again. “Would you just tell me if you sent these or not already? Easter still three months away and I don't have time to be looking out for intruders.”

Sandy blinked, a golden coloured box with a question mark on top formed over his head. Bunny stuttered through an explanation, never coming close enough to actually saying what it was.

“It's probably another fleshlight.” Jack's voice floated up to the two and the image of the box was replaced with a golden fleshlight and a question mark. Jack burst out laughing while Bunny stuttered and knocked away the image.

“No!” Bunny scoffed. “And how do you know all these things anyway?”

“You spend a few years around humans you pick up a few things.” Jack landed behind Sandy, placing his staff on the ground then hopping onto the crook. “By the way if you're not using that other one-”

“Oh rack off will you!” Bunny, tapped the sandy ground with more force than he meant to splashing sand on his fur as Sandy let out a soundless laugh. Bunny left the dream island for the safety of his warren, sending threats to his mysterious gift giver.


	8. Chapter 8

By the time Bunnymund got back to his den he was bone tired, Jack had followed him all the way to his European travel site and would have followed him to his warren had Bunnymund not locked the site behind him. Bunny dragged himself to his est, knocking over his easles and paint brushes without care. He burrowed into his nest, eyes drooping close and hoped that nothing unpleasant would should up on his doorstep.

“Sandman? Really?” A sharp intake of breath followed the question and hand Bunnymund on his feet. A paw went to his bandolier.

“Pitch! I sealed your realm off from mine. How did you get here?” Bunny pointed his boomarang in Pitch's face but the other spirit only smiled and ducked into a shadow.

“It was easy, Bunnymund, But I'm not here to talk about old grudges.” Pitch popped out of the shadows in Bunnymund's nest and made himself comfy. “I was quite sad to find out you didn't like my gifts and to go to Sanderson of all people with them. I'm just a little hurt.”

Bunnymund choked. “It was you! You were sending me those, those!” 

“Vibrators?” Pitch smiled. “I thought you'd might need to relax a bit.”

“I don't need to relax and I sure as hell don't need you to help me!” Bunnymund moved over to his bookshelf, all the way to the far back and started tossing various items into a box before dropping the box at Pitch's feet. It hummed a bit to fill the silence between the two spirits.

“Take your stuff and get out.” Bunnymud's eyes narrowed, his nose twitched.

Pitch's teeth sparkled in the low lighting of the glowing moss, adding an extra level of unease to situation. “Haven't you ever heard not to return a gift?”

“I don't want a gift from you.” Bunny hitched his Boomerang up.

“Pity, I was hoping we could use them together sometime.”

Bunnymund's jaw worked, trying to scream but ending up only choking. He flung his boomerang at Pitch, missing when the other spirit ducked into a shadow, laughter echoing around him. 

“Next time Bunny.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm attempting to get back into writing after a long time away. So I am very sorry to clog up the fandom with this.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes well this is going to be a very short series -unless I get bored and prolong it- where Bunnymund would receive weird and wondrous gifts.


End file.
